


Aches

by AnguaMarten



Category: Shingeki no Kyojin | Attack on Titan
Genre: Angst, Introspection, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-05-27
Updated: 2013-05-27
Packaged: 2017-12-13 04:07:52
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 422
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/819792
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/AnguaMarten/pseuds/AnguaMarten
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Reiner doesn't know what to think anymore. Spoilers for the manga.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Aches

They never told him anything.

Not why they were fighting, where they had come from, or what the point was. To any of it. He never understood.

Until one day, he did.

That was the day a monster attacked his village—not a titan, not like them. Mindless. A beast. It had devoured another boy, his friend, right in front of him. The humans had made it. That was what the elders said. They had seen the titans' strength and they had bottled it up with chemicals and injected it into more humans, and those humans became monsters. And the monsters ate anything. Well, anything that could think.

They just kept coming. The humans must be making more, they said. He saw friends die, neighbors die. His mother was torn apart in front of him, screaming as the mindless ones ripped at her flesh until she was nothing. On that day, he felt his heart turn as hard as his skin and he swore, the humans would pay.

Bertolt was still alive, and he was thankful for that. They'd enlisted together, scarcely been apart for the last three years. That was partly why he joined at all. Bertolt wouldn't last without him, he knew it. Not because he wasn't strong—Bertolt was the Colossus, a giant among titans. But he needed him. They both did. Neither could survive on their own.

Reiner often wondered if he knew, and how he would react if he did. They were partners, brothers at arms in the fight against humanity. He would die for Bertolt. They were all the other had in this strange half-life inside the wall. So of course Reiner wanted to protect him. Of course he wanted to be with him, stand with him like a light stands with its shadow. Of course he loved him.

He never told him anything.

Not in the moments they stole between classes and drills and pretending. Not in their hurried strategy meetings, where they scarcely had time to glance at a diagram and whisper a plan. Not at night, those rare strange nights when they somehow ended up burrowed in the same bed.

He never mentioned it the next day.

He'd met people here. Humans. They were like him in some ways. Too many ways. Too many people. It wasn't right. He shouldn't want to die for them. Bertolt reminded him of that, every day. Don't get attached. These people are nothing. Stick to the plan.

He wanted to tell him so much that it ached.


End file.
